Ms. Krasnow lauds monogamy, hard work, self-control, and taking responsibility for our own actions. In one case study she points out how abortion was a factor in destroying the marriage of one of her friends. She even brings up (in an uncomplimentary manner) our erstwhile 42nd president, his foibles and peccadillos.

Though she seems unaware of her inherent conservatism, Ms. Krasnow is perceptive in other ways. She makes some keen observations on marriage and the human condition in general. She writes in her prologue, "I'll tell you one thing that needs to be altered about expectations in relationships: that someone else can make us happy. An intrinsically unhappy person who leaves one marriage is going to be an unhappy person in a second and third marriage. Happiness is self-generated."

When my wife and I were looking to buy a house in Harbor Beach, Michigan, we asked the real estate agent if the neighbors were nice. He replied with a dialectical question, "Did you like the neighbors in your last neighborhood?" We replied in the affirmative. His response, "Then you will like the neighbors here." What he meant, of course, is that our relationships with others, and whether we are happy with them depends mostly on ourselves.

Such is the thrust of Ms. Krasnow's book. In myriad different ways she tells us that whether or not we have a successful marriage depends upon our own perspectives and actions. Yet, being a confessed liberal, she cannot help but call on innumerable support groups and therapists even while noting that the previous generation (that is the one before the baby-boomers) had greater success in marriage but without all the psycho-babble.

Many truisms sound trite when written out in a few words, "Surrendering means submitting to your own integrity, to your wedding promise, for the duration. This in the face of fantasies, boredom, and darkness that arise in long-term relationships." Trite, but true. Ms. Krasnow goes on to explore this statement at length, in anecdotal stories, quasi-case studies and in recounting her own experiences.

She is especially pre-occupied with lust. Which, I gather, she sees as the main reason that marriages do not stay together. Her view seems to be that animal magnetism coupled with our ability to delude ourselves about the true nature of the object of our desire is the main problem.

"Surrendering to Marriage" is written in a chatty style that devotees of Dr. Laura and Dr. Joy Brown will find both entertaining and engrossing. I read long passages from the book to my wife while on a road trip, and she enjoyed the insightful analysis, but occasionally threw her own twist into the mix.

Explaining why the peak time for most divorces is around the fourth year, Ms Krasnow sites anthropologist Helen Fisher on page 90. She says that infatuation occurs due to a small molecule in our brain known as PEA, and that this chemical reaction in our brain only keeps us infatuated for 2 or 3 years. My practical wife pointed out that this is also the time in most marriages that one or two children have just hit the "Terrible Twos"! If a marriage can survive the conflict generated by having to jointly deal with a screaming demon on a daily basis for a year or more, it can deal with anything.

This book is admittedly written from a woman's perspective, if not specifically for women. Both sexes will find the information useful. Men will find some sections entertaining as when Ms. Krasnow admits, "I'm a sucker for a guy who can do chores, I mean real chores." Women will identify with the intuitive perspective and diary-like case studies.

The prominent lesson readers will take away from this book is that the "grass is seldom greener on the other side...", so we should make the best of the relationships that we have - especially if there are children involved. Dr. Laura couldn't have said it plainer.

This book can be purchased at Amazon.com.