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I was good at my job and well liked at work. It's just that I became increasingly aware that under this definition, being successful had very little to do with my skills, or ability to make the workplace better, or my worth to society in general. I didn't feel like I was 'earning' a cent of what I made under any standard. I began having trouble relating to my 'friends' ('you think too much' they said) I tried really hard not to think my friends, co-workers, boss, subordinates were just shallow people.
And so I became privately obsessed with the degree to which, my act of siphoning money from the economy (at a job any high school graduate could do) was an insult to people who for one reason or another, couldn't attain my useless job or my status on the corporate ladder. I couldn't look a homeless person in the eye anymore.
I have since gone back to school, and am acquiring some training to work in a field that produces something intrinsically valuable to society. (medical device, bridges, agricultural techniques, renewable energy) I would now find it unethical to limit distribution of anything I make or invent by taking a large profit. I know for the next five years or so, I will earn two-thirds of what I made just out of college, but technically I will be above the poverty line. I am happier with myself now, but I also understand (because I was there myself) that because of my newfound political beliefs I am under contempt and mockery from the wealthy classes and the conservatives that support them.
It is hard not to be angry.
I know, I'm 'touchy feely' and I'm a 'sore loser' or I just need to get laid or get counseling because you think I got picked on during elementary school (I didn't) or I need to read that book that tells you that it is healthy and good for society if we would all just be selfish and self-serving. I'm sorry, I've given the matter lots of thought and I don't agree. Not that you should care what I think - you will all do fine, if I've learned anything in the last 15 years, it's that self-serving predatory jerks always do quite well.
I love all of you, and I would be happy if anything I did or made ever saved your life, but I certainly don't like any of you.
Stranger
Our Response:
Dear Stranger,
You are quite mistaken in your perspective. Conservatives do not simply support the wealthy class. I don't think a true conservative would criticize your actions or beliefs. The fundamental belief of a conservative is to allow every person the right to act and work as they will as long as they support themselves and don't hurt anyone else. If this means allowing people to get rich, so be it. If it means allowing people to "help" others as you seem so bent on doing, so be it.
Conservatism is a notion that letting people follow their own convictions and their own interests is the system that is the most beneficial for all of society.
By the way, you do need to lighten up.
Cordially,
WJR
Reply from Stranger
People have been telling me to 'lighten up' since I was ten.
I try and I get disappointed each time. If there really is a way to live a standard American lifestyle without exploiting someone else on this planet (this country, even) who lives in absolute hell, I haven't found it in 15 years of trying to 'lighten up.'
Like I said, I've fallen unfathomably deep through a crack in your wonderful society.
Have a sh*tty day.
Another response
Dear Sir,
You seem to want to blame all your problems on others. Try looking within and perhaps you will find that most of your problems are self-generated.
I urge you to read "The Meditations" by Marcus Aurelius. It was the book that turned my own attitude in a positive direction. I don't think that you are ever going to find a world - even a world that there is only one person, yourself - where everyone does exactly what you want. Thus you must work on your own attitudes and actions and count on this work to improve the world.
I am sorry to bring you the bad news, but your "Hell" is entirely self-generated and what you perceive as exploitation is only bargaining between various members of society for goods and services. I think any rational view of economics and history will show that liberty and capitalism is the best rout to the greatest possibility for happiness for everyone willing to pursue it (which is all that is guaranteed in life).
And, as for what kind of day I have, rest assured that it does not depend upon your malicious wishes.
Cordially, as ever,
W.J. Rayment
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