Bangers and Mash

Only Finland has worse food than England. And thanks to England, we’ve got Mad Cow… to paraphrase the elegant and sophisticated leader of France, Jacques Chirac. But what old Jacques failed to realize during his smug remarks about England is that people were listening. Tony Blair is reportedly fuming and even worse, Chirac’s insulting comments about Finland found their way back to the IOC… or for those who hate acronyms, the International Olympic Committee.

Old Jacques stabbed himself in the foot by implying how terrible such cuisine as reindeer steak and salted salmon are (reindeer is pretty good by the way)… favorites in Finland, and enjoyed by two IOC members from Finland who voted on which city would host the 2012 summer Olympics. Although voting on the host city for the Olympics is secret, many in Helsinki say that Finland's two IOC members, Peter Tallberg and Jari Kurri, backed London after Chirac made his derogatory comments.

So the Olympic Committee went with merry old London--in the process flipping France the bird and giving the other cities in the running an obligatory pat on the back. Public reaction to the results was typical. New Yorkers were said to be upset but optimistic about 2016, the French were said to have admitted defeat even before entering their bid, the Russians have decided to slap the IOC with an overwhelming back tax bill in order to confiscate it and the Spanish left work early to celebrate... not even knowing there was a vote.

Jacques and his antics remind us of the greatest defeatist in television history, George Costanza of Seinfeld. Much like Chirac, George found himself constantly saying the wrong things at the wrong time. George was a habitual loser who was always one to offend and denigrate. In George’s mind, the world was out to get him. Jacques Costanza?

In one of the most memorable episodes, George decides to do everything opposite of what he would normally do… including telling the truth. Guess what? George finally had things going his way. Maybe old Jacques should take a page out of the Costanza playbook and try doing the very opposite of what he’s doing now. After all, the guy is on a tremendous losing streak.

The union his country helped to create is in shambles, his approval rating among the French is under 30% and his economy just plain stinks.

We’ve been telling you for two years now that the euro would have only novelty value and the European Union was a sham. Each day that passes, more and more of the world agrees with us. How do you profit from Chirac’s blunders? Read the July issue of Powerhouse Profits to find out more. www.powerhouseprofits.net

In defense of England, their food is tasty (and they don’t use the euro)… shepherd’s pie, scotch eggs, bangers and mash, crown roast lamb, beef Wellington, beef stew, mince meat and of course fish n’ chips. With the exception of blood pudding, black pudding and jellied eels, English cuisine is highly enjoyable. The aforementioned dishes should be permanently removed from the menu though. Congratulations London on your winning bid for the Olympics. I’ll raise my pint of bass to your victory, and I may even watch some of the games… but this I cannot promise.